Garrett Gomez was seventeen when cocaine entered his life—and before long, he had learned how to work around racing's drug tests while continuing to ride.

In this remarkably candid conversation with biographer Rodolfo Alvarado, Garrett reveals how functioning became its own dangerous illusion, convincing him that as long as he could keep riding, he could keep using. But as the drugs, alcohol, and consequences escalated, the system Garrett thought he had beaten began closing in around him.